Good Riddance!

To 2008! It was a very interesting year for us, let's recap :

January

• My mom retired from teaching! Her and Dad not vacation constantly!
• Michael informed me he would be leaving for a year on this deployment.

February

• We spent V-Day apart, as Michael was away for two weeks of training.

March

• We celebrated David (my cousing) and Devin's wedding
• I took Michael to visit Atlantic City for the first time (We lost too much money!)

April

• We visited the Inner Harbor on our Spring Break
• Jack (my brother) and Sarah got married!
• Michael left for another week or so of training.
• We got to attend the Military Ball! I love dressing up, plus he looks good in Uniform!

May

• Justin (Mike's brother) graduated from High School!

June

• Michael left for three weeks of training and missed my birthday (again!)
• We celebrated good friends Courtney and Gabe's wedding
• Michael and I celebrated our first wedding anniversary! 3

July

• Michael, Jack, Sarah and I vacationed in Disney! The best place on Earth!

August

• We started back to school, football and field hockey, with the deployment inching closer!

September

• Michael stopped teaching and went full time to prepare at the unit.
• We had his going away party. I think he had a good time, and Lord knows we had enough food!

October

• The dreaded month! Michael began his 12 month deployment to Iraq.
• I survived the first month!
• Michael finished his Master's!
  

November

• I got to see Michael for five wonderful days on leave. It was amazing!
• We celebrated Turkey Day on opposite sides of the Earth :(

December

• Michael arrived at his final destination on his tour.
• We celebrated Christmas on opposite sides of the Earth :(
• I finished my Master's!

We have had a very busy, and emotional year. Although I can't wait to get out of 2008, I have to say it has made our relationship stronger, and I have learned that I am capable of many things! I unclogged a toilet by myself today! I am proud of myself and my husband, and look forward to all the wonderful things to come in 2009!

Merry Christmas

Even from around the world, my amazing husband has made my Christmas a good one. I was excited to get to my in-laws house this morning because I knew a present from Michael, which he ordered from Helzberg Diamonds, was waiting! Of course, my wonderful brother-in-law had put the box inside three other boxes, and did an amazing job of taping. After much swearing, laughing and keying, I successfully opened the boxes! Michael got me a white gold claddagh ring. It is an Irish tradition that stands for friendship, love and loyalty. I have had other ones, but they have broken and gotten lost. I have said many times I wanted a nice one, and Michael remembered! He also got me a gift certificate so I can go shopping at the beach!

I was able to talk to him a few times today, and he wasn't in the best of moods, which is understandable, but after talking to his family he seemed better. I love Christmas, but I couldn't wait to get this one over with. Another day down.

Thank you Michael for making my Christmas the best it could be without you. I love you and I hope you enjoyed your presents.

Just Another Day

It has been a really good vacation so far! Saturday was spent celebrating a friends birthday, Monday I got Michael's car fixed ($500 later....thank you Honda), and Tuesday I met a good friend for drinks at the local Mexican restaurant. Now comes one part of the break I am dreading - Christmas Eve and Christmas. If you know me, then you know this is my absolute favorite holiday. I decorate a month in advance, love wrapping presents and love waking up on Christmas morning - I swear I am a 5 year old sometimes.

This year I have felt different for obvious reasons. Tonight in church, Michael won't be next to me, I won't get to open our presents together tomorrow morning, or go to our families houses together to celebrate. I haven't felt in the spirit at all this year, partly because I didn't want to do it without Mike. It's not fair that he cant' be here - I feel so bad for him mostly. At least I can still do the traditions, even if he isn't here. Poor Michael has to work tomorrow.

In the end, it's just another day, and we will be one day closer.

Letter from Iraq

This is from part of Michael's letter from Iraq:

Kelly,
Well, this may be the first Christmas card I have ever sent and I hope it is my last because I don't plan on being away for another Christmas. Well when this is all over and done we will be stronger. Have a great Christmas and remember I love you....

Love, Michael

The card went on to say this :

Many years from now, we may not remember whether it snowed...or how big or straight the tree was, or even what presents we gave each other (or that I was in Iraq) but forever, we'll remember the love. Merry Christmas.


Michael, I love you 6,000 miles away.

In Charge

As Christmas draws closers, I am sure it is hard for Michael to be away. Of course I wouldn't know because he would never tell me, but I guess I can imagine. The unit that they are replacing is leaving shortly and I know Mike is excited to finally be in charge and on his own in the office. He seems to be adjusting well and likes his job. I am happy they are leaving because it just means we are one step closer to Michael coming home. I guess the next step would be his 15 day leave at some point. That is still a long ways away, so until then I can at least mark off this milestone!

Back at home, we only have one day of school left before our long break begins! Thank goodness. I have reached my final straw with my rowdy students and will be very thankful for Happy Hour tomorrow after work. I also will be going back to work at the restaurant next week. I love making that extra money!

Weird December!

There is definitely something wrong with our world when I am outside in shorts, running, in December! Today it was gorgeous! I would say at least 60 out, and decided to go for a run. It was so warm, I decided to brave it and wear shorts. Halfway through my two miles, I was cursing myself for not wearing short sleeves! Completely insane! Rocky and Titan also enjoyed it, as I spend almost a half hour outside throwing the ball to them. Currently Rocky is passed out on the couch next to me! Finally! It's like having little kids around all night. I am a single parent almost!

Michael called me yesterday, and told me I should watch the news. Of course, my heart skipped a beat, but then I realized if something had happened he wouldn't WANT me to watch the news. After beating around the 'bush,' and Michael yelling that it wasn't a secure line so he couldn't tell me anything, I figured out that the President himself was planning a visit. He was already in the country, and from what I found out later, had shoes thrown at him! I am sure there is a YouTube video somewhere if you missed it! Anyway, after the incident, Michael was able to meet the President! His comment to me was, "Yeah, I only had to go halfway around the world." Ironic when his house is so close to our actual home!

Snail Mail

I am an old fashioned type of girl, and think that although e-mail is nice (and fast), nothing is better than a card or letter in the mail. For someone to go out of there way to look for a card that says the perfect thing, and then write something sentimental, it is just so meaningful. I have received two of these from Michael in the last two weeks. I wasn't expecting either, which makes it so much more special. The one today was a Christmas card that just melted my heart. I know that we are going to get through this, and we are going to be so strong because of it. Don't get me wrong, it still is the hardest thing we have ever gone through, but Michael is truly the my best friend, and there is no one else I would rather wait for.

I myself have tried to send him snail mail. I figured packages are nice, but just a regular letter is nice too. I went in to Hallmark the other day, and I could not find a single 'Love' card or 'Miss you.' I even asked the lady and she couldn't find them. How ridiculous is that? I guess I will try again tomorrow!

Tear Jerker

This was sent to me in an e-mail. Brace yourself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ervaMPt4Ha0

Miss and love you....

Guess what I got?

The UPS man delivered a wonderful surprise today - a package from Josten's! If you don't know this company, they are the ones that make graduation rings, announcements, cap and gowns, etc. At first I was confused, and then I realized what it was - my cap and gown for graduation! It was so exciting! I had planned to walk at graduation because my best friend and I were graduating at the same time, but unfortunately she has one more class to take :( I don't really want to walk alone, so I probably won't end up going, but I did fill out the forms just so I could get my gown. Every person who graduates wants their hood! I figured why not? If I was paying $75 to graduate no matter what, the least they owed me was my cap and gown. I tried to put it all on, but I cannot get the hood to look right, so I will have to wait until someone is her to assist me! It was a very exciting day!

Armed and Ready!

Today, after school I had numerous errands to run :

• The dreaded Wal-Mart (I hate it, but if I waited another day, I would have been reduced to roasting marshmellows for dinner)
• Post Office
• WaWa for gas, so I could get home!
• The bank to cash a check Michael and I had received from Wilmington University

The last of these bullets, I knew was going to be interesting. The check was written out in Michael's name, and even though my name is also on the account, I remember, and you probably do to, that this basically means nothing. BUT this time I came prepared. I walked into the bank, signed the check and took it to the nearest teller. At first, I didn't think she was going to say anything, but then, she did the double take. She said,"Oh, we have a problem, the check is in Michael's name." And I said, yes, I know, he is in Iraq, and unable to sign it. Again, "Oh, well..." Then BAM, I didn't even give her a chance, I whipped out the Power of Attorney I have been reduced to carry around with me, 'just in case.' The check was then cashed without incident.

Score one for the army wife.

Officially DONE!

Tonight was the night - my LAST night of class. As I walked out of class at 7:30, I had fulfilled my LAST obligation in my Master's Degree requirements. It was an amazing feeling. Too bad I still have 15 classes to go for my +45....but that's a different day. Right now, I am sitting, drinking a glass of wine, celebrating, and wishing Michael was here with me so we could both celebrate being finished.

I did get a phone call today from him for a minute. It was during our 4th grade band assembly, so all of the parents must have thought I was a looney when I went sprinting out of the gym! Oh well...they can think what they want - I got to talk to my husband! It is so nice to hear from him, and receive more than one e-mail a day. It's almost like he is at the high school, e-mailing me like normal throughout the day...the only difference is, he isn't waiting at home. I also received a surprise card in the mail from him today. I am a truly sentimental person...I love cards with personal notes. I think they let someone know that they truly care because they took the time and went out of their way to think of them, buy a card and write a note. To me, that is the best gift. The card made me cry, of course! I love him more everyday, even 3,000 miles away!

I Love Technology!

Today was the first day that I was able to see Michael since he left in November! Michael was finally able to hook up to the internet with his computer, and I was able to see him on the video camera. He looked so amazing, and seemed in a really good mood - I guess anything is better than Kuwait. I cannot describe to you how happy I was to see him. I wish I could reach through the screen and touch him though. Just seeing him makes me feel so much better. Not only was I able to see him, but I received like four e-mails today. I am so glad that he now has access to more technology. Maybe tonight I will be able to sleep a little better.

A Military Wife

Ok, I know I have posted many times today, but as I was de-stressing in my bubble bath, drinking wine and reading "Chicken Soup for the Military Wife's Soul," (Yes, I know, a recipe for disaster on a Saturday night!), I came across this passage that completely explained everything. I felt the need to share it with everyone, since it explains exactly how I am feeling....

The Unseen Veteran by Amanda Legg
To understand military life, or what it feels like to be the proud wife of a soldier, you need to experience it.
One day he was here and now he is gone...He isn't beside me in bed...His scent slowly fades, as does the memory of his face...I can barely remember the familiary sounds of him at home. I long for comfort when I have a nightmare. I want him to hold me. I wait for those comforting letters or the phone calls that come after silence.
Now, I look upon single parents in awe...and I learn to do what they do, until my husband comes home. I don't need a man to put a crib together, or take care of the car or to take out the trash. I have learned to be empathetic. I have become self-sufficient.
And even though these are wonderful things, I would give up everything that I have learned to bring him home right now.
When I think I cannot go on, I rely on my routine so that I can support my husband while he defends our freedom. And I know I am not the only one.
I am an unseen veteran. So are all of the other military spouses out there. We have different battlefields. Our maps have pins in the countries of worry, heartache and loneliness. Our battles will end when our husbands are in our arms agains.


Michael, I am so proud of you. I love and miss you everyday....Stay safe.

Christmas Happenings

Last night (as I was waiting for that phone call!) I attended our 4th grade teacher party we have every year. The food was great (too many points to count!) and we had a lot of fun. During the Chinese auction, I even won a gift card to WaWa! I did miss Michael of course, but I am sure he was thankful he didn't have to sing the Christmas Carols! I was the number 10 in the 12 days of Christmas, thank goodness I didn't get 1!

Tomorrow, the FRG is having their Christmas party for the families, so Michael's mom and dad are going up with me. They are having Santa, of course, and perhaps a video from the soldiers. It will be nice to hang out with other people who know what you are going through for awhile.

I love my friends - they are amazing. I have received phone calls, and cards constantly for the last two months. I love them and I am so thankful I have them! I just want to say thank you to everyone who checks up on me and makes sure I haven't just curled up in my bed in the fetal position. I love you guys.

Boots on the Ground

Well, my Friday did not start off too good. I ran to the copier before students came, was gone MAYBE two minutes, and when I came back, I realized I left my phone there - no big deal, Michael normally doesn't call until 9:00 or so. But there it was - what I had dreaded - the 'Missed Call' message and "1 new voicemail." Of course - I had missed him by one minute. It was awful. I e-mailed right away, telling him to call back, I was there now, and I even tried to call back but apparently you can't call Kuwait.

I waited all day, all last night - no phone call, no e-mail, it was miserable. I woke up every hour, checking the Blackberry to see if I had a new e-mail, but no. Not until 8:00 this morning, when I received an e-mail telling me that he had called just to say he loved me and they were moving out. The unit flew into Iraq in the early morning, and arrived safely at their location. He is currently moved into his room and is getting settled. I have to say I did breath a sigh of relief - flying in Iraq is dangerous, and half a world away, there is nothing I can do but pray. We are one step closer to him coming home - not to mention, Michael will be happier now since Kuwait sucked!

Updates and Birthdays

Last night, as I watched the tree lighting in New York, I think I realized the enormity of the situation Michael and I are in. I know that he willingly signed up, and that I married him knowing full well this even was possible, but I still never realized what it would entail. Being apart from him has been the hardest thing. Even when he was in Texas, it was hard, but he was still in the U.S. He has had training that has lasted just as long! Now with the holidays approaching, and the brigade's impending departure from Kuwait to Iraq, I think it has become even more real.

From what I understand from Michael, in the little time I have talked with him, I have realized the Kuwait is pretty close to a hell hole. He hates it. There are no other words to describe his emotion. He can't wait to get to Iraq, meanwhile, I wish he would stay longer in Kuwait. I know that he is miserable, and I do at least want him to be somewhat happy so his time can go faster, but Kuwait is safe. Iraq is unknown and scary. Tonight on the news they reported that in November, there was the lowest number of deaths in Iraq and Afghanistan combined - only 11. To anyone else this may seem amazing, but to mean it is still awful. There are 11 families who are without their loved ones. Instead of waiting for them to come home, there won't be a homecoming. It is a scary, scary thing. Christmas without Michael sucks. Deployment sucks. I was speaking with a fellow wife, and she said ya know, we try to put on a good face, but sometimes there are no other words to say besides this sucks.


But Michael and I will get through it. I say a prayer everyday that he comes home to me safely. I still am not sleeping through the night, and I carry my phone around like life support but I will live. Yes I am more emotional, I cry at the drop of a hat, and wine, which I love, is probably not the best decision, but I will survive.

On a much lighter note - Happy Birthday Courtney! You are officially old! Congratulations! Make sure Gabe either cooks or takes you out to a nice restaurant! Love you!

Welcome December!

It has officially been two months since the deployment started. Again, as I look back, it seems to have gone by so quickly, but in the moment it seems to take forever. I miss him so much, I can't even explain it. Today, as I was driving his car, a check engine light came on, of course. (Doesn't everything happen when he is away?!) I took it to his step-dad, since he is a car genius, but even he wasn't sure. So tomorrow I am off to the Auto Parts store to buy a book so Michael's dad can fix it! Let's hope it isn't something too serious or expensive!

I talked to Michael today for about two minutes. I love hearing from him, but those calls are so bittersweet because I only get what feels like, half a second to talk. How can I squeeze in two or three days worth in five minutes? When he gets into Iraq, I am sure he will have more time on the internet, and we can finally use our video camera to see each other. I can't wait to see him!

Only 10 more months to go....

State Champs!

Last night, our high school football team won the state championship by a score of 20 - 0! The team had not been to the playoffs since 1974, and made national headlines and broke records with a 0 - 40 losing streak. They have come a long way! My Dad is one of the coaches, and was ecstatic last night! I am very proud of the coaches the team. What a great win! I e-mailed Michael and he called me and said he was excited. I know he is sad because he couldn't see it though. My parents are surprising him with a DVD of the two playoff games in the package they are sending him for Christmas. He will be excited - it won't be the same, but I am sure it will help! Congratulations Bucs!

I am a Master!!

Ok, so it isn't official yet, BUT I have FINISHED! I turned in my LAST final paper for my class, which means I am finished all of my work. All I have to wait for now is for my professor to post the final grade, which won't happen until after our class is finished, but oh well. I do have one more night of class to attend, so I guess I am not done, but I am done all of the work which counts for something!

That means tonight I am celebrating! Probably by myself, but who cares. I know Michael is happy for me half a world away! Michael is doing well, I know yesterday was hard because it was a holiday, but we made it through and today he sent me a list of DVD's to send him for Christmas (Because the PS3 wasn't enough!) That is ok, I would buy him the world if it would help him get through this next year. I am not one of the brave ones who takes on Black Friday, so I internet shopped instead. I did get some great deals actually! At least I saved gas money and being pushed around by others! Happy shopping!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Another year has passed, and the holidays are upon us once again. The crazy last minute shopping, checking our bank accounts to make sure we have enough money, baking cookies, trying to get out Christmas cards in time, and trying to untangle those Christmas lights. With all of this going on, it is very easy to forget to take time out and be thankful for everything you have. I have decided to make a list of the things I am most thankful for this year :

• My marriage - I am married to the most wonderful man. He is my best friend and I love him more than he knows (Well maybe not, since I tell him constantly)
• My friends - This deployment has been hard, but when I get phone calls, and cards in the mail I realize just how lucky I am. Thank you guys!
• My family - They have been a wonderful support throughout my life and I love them very much.
• Our house - We can afford the mortgage and it is perfect for us.
  
• My job - With today's economy, I am very lucky to be one of the ones who has a job. Last year, due to budget cuts, I almost lost it, and although the kids sometimes drive me crazy, I love my job!
• Finishing my Master's! Only 2 weeks to go....
  

I am sure there is more, and I may have to come back and add, but these are the ones that stuck out. Michael and I hope everyone has a safe and happy Thanksgiving holiday!

Wonderful Week!

Only two days of school! What more could a teacher ask for? The kids were crazy, of course, but they did a great job of getting through it and presenting their projects before they left for break. A five day week - what in the world will I do with myself?

I got a lot accomplished today - grading all my papers, planned for next week so I don't have to do anything on vacation, stopped at the base to pick up my new ID (AND got there as a plane was landing!! I thought of you Michael...yes I'm a dork!), and am finished one more class. ONLY 1 MORE NIGHT OF CLASS TO GO!

I have to finish this week's class work, and then my last big paper. I am hoping I will be finished by Thursday! That means I have to summarize 14 chapters in two days, think I can do it?

Milestones

So of you may know I joined Weight Watchers last year in the Spring along with the rest of my staff at the school. I am not one who is very good with diets, as I LOVE to eat. This plan is great for me because I can still eat what I want, I just need to WATCH what I eat for a change, and monitor my portions, which is always my downfall. I successfully lost 13 pounds in just six weeks! Unfortunately, with summer came the laziness and back to bad eating. I didn't gain back everything, but half was more than enough. With a friends wedding coming up shortly, and Michael coming home in June for a few days, I figured now is as good as time as any to jump back on the wagon. I am proud to say that in the first week of really monitoring my points I lost 5 pounds! This is a lot for me, so I'm still not convinced that my scale is just wacky, but I'll take it! I promise to be HOT and TAN for my husband in June for his 30th, my 25th and our 2nd anniversary!!

Today was also the first day that I didn't actually speak with Michael. In the years that we have been together, I don't think there is a day that has gone by that we haven't at least spoken on the phone. He is my best friend, who I tell everything to, even mundane everyday occurrences. Not being able to talk to him is killing me worse than not touching him. I am a constant worrier (HELLO, type A personality!) and am the type of person who needs to know everything in order to be ok with a situation. Not knowing anything besides where he is doesn't make me feel any better. He is so good at what he does, and I know that, but I will always worry about him!

On a good note - today is Monday which means I can watch Jon and Kate plus 8, AND there is only one more day of school left this week!

New Goodies!

Yesterday, I was pleasantly surprised to find my laptop already on my doorstep! It only took two days and I didn't pay ANY extra! I guess with the economy no one else is buying a computer - HA. It is very nice to become even more lazy, and watch T.V. while on the computer! I spoke with Michael yesterday and he is insanely jealous! I am sure when he comes home in June I won't be able to use it! On a side note, the internet on out other computer is, of course, still working!

With Michael being gone, sleep is a hard thing to come by, so at 7:00 this morning, I was up and running errands around town. I am happy to say that I have purchased some goodies to send to Michael, and some other Christmas presents. I have such a hard time shopping for Christmas. I get so worried about whether or not someone is going to like the present I give them, that normally I talk myself out of buying it, and then I am back at square one. I want to make sure that Michael has presents to open on Christmas, even though he was spoiled and got his PS3 on leave. He didn't take it with him so I can't send him games or BluRay's. If you have any ideas, let me know, pleaseeee!

Although it is Sunday, and I hate Sundays, another day has passed right? I am also looking forward to the upcoming week - only two days, and then Thanksgiving break! I have one big paper left to write over break, and then my classwork and my Master's will be pretty much finished. I can't believe it! What are your plans over break?

Go Bucs!

So last night, I wrote that I was taking tickets at the local high school playoff football game. I graduated from the school six years ago, and our football program was decent, but we never made the playoffs. In fact, it had been 34 years since the team had done so. They finished first in the conference, which gave them a first round bye. The semi-final game was last night, when they played an up-state team.

The beginning of the game started with a white-out snow squall that game through. It was insane! My feet were so cold they physically hurt! I don't know how the boys did it. The game ended 45 - 14 Bucs! I know everyone is so excited that the team will be going to a CHAMPIONSHIP game!

Michael would love this if he were here, and I am so sad he can't see it. He e-mailed me this morning and said they were doing well, but it kills me not to be able to just pick up the phone and call him! But another day has passed!

Really?

So last night when I ordered my laptop - which I am excited for now, even though it was way expensive :(, I had to call the credit card company and verify the transaction so they would know it wasn't a fraudulent charge. Upon calling, the women informed me they would have to speak to the primary person on the card, Michael, and I kindly informed her that wouldn't be happening because he was in Iraq. She then asked if he could call. I mean really? I informed her NO, he would not be calling. She went on to ask if I could e-mail him and explain the situation. Still, pretty calm, I told her that would be nice, but since I was ordering a computer, that meant I didn't have the ability to do that because the other one was broken. She then asked again if she could talk to him. Really? What else do I have to say. I told her my name was on the card, I had Power of Attorney, which I had already faxed but miraculously, they didn't have of course. Anyway, I switched the method of payment on the computer, and it is still on it's way, thank goodness.

I was fine with it, until I received a call from Michael today saying that they had declined his credit card when he was trying to buy items on post. Now this is why I lost it. I don't need it, I have another card, but he most certainly does. He doesn't just carry around spares over there! So I call today, calm at first, AND I had faxed the Power of Attorney AGAIN. I inform the lady I sent it, she went to go check and then she said she couldn't help me because it wasn't her department. I informed her that I was told to call this number, and the card needed to be activated immediately because Michael needed it, and he didn't have any other one. (That may be a lie, but I don't care.) At this point I am irate, she asked if I needed to talk to a supervisor. I informed her that would be wonderful since no one else could seem to help me. After freaking on the supervisor, and being told that I had sent the POA to the wrong number (this was the number the COMPANY gave me, but whatever) she fixed the problem. I mean WTF. How hard is it? My name is on the card....I don't get it!

Either way, it's working, Michael is safely at his destination, and it's Friday! Tonight I am taking tickets at our high school football playoff game. It is the first time we have made the playoffs in over 34 years!! I don't know the exact number...maybe 34? Go Bucs!!!

Lagging Behind

Sorry for the lack of posts - Gabe I will do my best to keep you entertained at work, also you haven't commented on my Chuck Norris Fact of the Day. GEEZ. Scroll down and look on the right!

Anyway, I have been keeping busy here and things are going well. Michael called me Wednesday to tell me they were flying out, but they did have a layover in Maine so he would call. After he landed in Maine, we knew that would be the last we talked for awhile, so we said our goodbyes around 7, and I was reduced to waiting patiently for his call. Surprisingly at 9:30, I receive a text message - I never knew you could do that on planes. Needless to say, you can't and they were still sitting on the runway. Turns out the radar was broken? so they were able to stay in a hotel for the night. They left late this morning, and I just heard from him from Europe somewhere. I won't say because a family already ratted out to the newspaper they had a delay in Maine, and that caused a problem! They will be there for about two hours or so and then off to another destination! It is so crazy to me to think he is in another COUNTRY halfway around the world. It's just bizarre.

The lack of blogging hasn't been just because I am an overachiever and never stop to slow down, but because our internet problem has resurfaced! I took the computer up to the store today, and of course it worked fine! But they did say the part I needed was around $800 - $900 to replace since it was no longer under warranty. So as much as it hurt, Michael convinced me to buy a new laptop, because it's almost just as much! It hurt my heart to spend that much. I don't think I am going to buy anything for weeks. Of course, I get home, plug the computer BACK in and it works! Oh well, what are you going to do? Michael said it was just going to go out again, and I can't bear that thought of not having ANY contact with him, or not being able to see him, so I broke down. I guess love is priceless!!!!

One Step Closer

I hate good-byes. They suck. There is no other word to describe them, sorry. Saying good-bye to Michael in the airport was awful. Before he walked to security, a man saw him and wished him good luck. I am so grateful for those random strangers who recognize what Michael is doing for them...there is no other way to thank them, gift cards and packages are nice, but a simply thank you or wishing someone luck is amazing, especially when it's from a total stranger.

I hate prolonging sad moments, thankfully so does my husband. We were a little early, and his flight was delayed, but I think if I sat there for another hour I would have completely lost it. Even though saying good-bye was difficult, actually walking and then driving away was worse. I don't know how to explain it, but somehow, since his flight hadn't taken off yet, I felt as though I were leaving him, instead of the other way around. The next month will be hard, and then I will fall back into my routine. Once he gets to Iraq it will be interesting to see how we can work out the time difference - they are 8 hours ahead. I hate being apart, but at least at the end of every day without him there is a silver lining - we are one day closer to being finished with this deployment.

Dreadful Sundays

Normally I complain about Sunday's because they are the days that Michael and I had the most rituals...we wake up, run to WaWa to get the Sunday papers and breakfast, he reads the paper, while I read the Life section and the ads, then we run up to Target, topped of by dinner at his Grandparents and Sunday night T.V. This Sunday sucks because he is leaving me. When he left the first time, it was sad of course, but I knew he would be back around this time, so I had something to look forward to. June is a long way away, and this is what makes this good-bye so much more difficult.

Of course, to make matters worse, the internet on my computer is also down AGAIN. I just don't get it. Michael was here this time, but he couldn't get it to work, so I am witout the internet after he leaves. Perfect. Once Michael heads back to Texas, he will leave for Kuwait in the next week or so. Please take the time to say an extra prayer for the brigades safe flight!

Home!

I received a very nice surprise on Wednesday, Michael was able to fly stand-by on an earlier flight and was home much sooner than expected! I was able to pick him up in the airport - he did look quite handsome in his uniform of course. It is so nice to be able to do the simple things together - get pizza from Mama Maria's, run to Wal-Mart, Best Buy (even though I hate that store), Target. To simply wake up next to him in the morning is the most amazing thing. I used to take that for granted, but I never will again. The boys were very happy to see him on Wednesday, and I thought poor little Titan wasn't going to be able to get to him fast enough!

We also had the chance to open gifts - he was very pleased with his PS3, and I am proud to say it was actually a SECRET for once! The quality of the Blue Ray is definitely amazing (when we got the right cables, of course!).

I was up early this morning so I could finish some work for my class, and not take time away from being with Michael. I figured I would let everyone know how our weekend was so far. Today we get to go to Happy Hour with some friends. Unfortunately, as I knew it would, Sunday is approaching way to quickly for me. I honestly don't know how I am going to say goodbye to him. Until then, I am going to cherish every moment we have - back down to bed I go to cuddle.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Happy Veteran's Day!

To all of those who are veterans, thank you for everything you have done for our country. Words cannot express our gratitude to you and your families. Since Michael has already been deployed during the Iraq war, he is also a veteran. I love you and am so proud of you LT.

The Soldier

It is the soldier, not the reporter,
who has given us freedom of the press.

It is the soldier, not the poet,
who has given us freedom of speech.

It is the soldier, not the campus organizer,
who has given us the freedom to demonstrate.

It is the soldier, not the lawyer,
who has given us the right to a fair trial.

It is the soldier,
who salutes the flag,
who serves under the flag,
and whose coffin is draped by the flag,
who allows the protester to burn the flag.

By Father Dennis Edward O'Brien, USMC

1 Day....

Two Days...

Michael will be home in two days! I like to think it's only one day, since it's the day after tomorrow and I shouldn't have to count the day he gets home, but he won't fly in until 10:30 that night. Blah. At least he gets home a day earlier than I thought. I know saying goodbye to him on Sunday is going to be the hardest thing I have ever done. We have been about four a month at a time, and now six weeks at a time, but 8 months is just ridiculous to think about. By the end of this, we will have been apart almost as long as we have been married. Insane. But until Sunday, I will enjoy every minute we have together.

Tomorrow we don't have school since it is Veterans day. I will spend the day taking Titan to get handsome for Michael, doctor's appointment, cleaning the house and other nonsense. I also have class, blah (only 3 more to go!). The day will definitely keep me busy and preoccupied so I don't think about Wednesday night ALL day!

Sunday Fun!

So normally I spend Sundays complaining about how much I miss Michael! Well this Sunday, I got to spend the day shopping with one of my good friends. I still missed Michael of course, but I had a great time. I hardly ever go shopping for myself, and Alexis doesn't either, so the afternoon was spent trying to convince each other to actually spend money on ourselves! We got to eat lunch at Olive Garden, and snagged some great deals! Thank God for good friends.

Michael will be home in just two days (Today is already over, and Wednesday doesn't count). I am so excited I can hardly stand it!

Election Results

Well, Michael owes me a 20 minute back rub next week! I am happy for who won, obviously, but I was not prepared for the news this morning. All I saw were people crying and screaming and praising Jesus. At work today, there were many people with Obama shirts on. Here is my question, if McCain had won, would those supporters have shirts on? No I don't think so. It is going to be interesting to say the least.

WARNING - The Army makes you Miserable

Yes, it's true. When Michael reads this, he may not agree with me, but I swear it's true. Back in the day, when just a weekend apart from him was unbearable (If I only knew....) I always noticed how his attitude would change. I started saying I hated drill weekends because he came home every night miserable and with an attitude. I knew it wasn't my fault, but it was just annoying!

Because of this, I should have known this would happen. Poor Michael is in a bad mood again. Maybe not a bad mood, but at least touchy. I have noticed it more in the past week or so, and it may be because things are much busier down there now, and they are getting ready to leave. Either way, he is grumpy. It makes our phone conversations sad sometimes. I really don't want to argue with him or get in a fight. We only get to talk MAYBE ten minutes a day, so our time is precious. It gets me very upset when we will get in a fight over something so ridiculous.

I know he is stressed, I can't even begin to imagine what he is going through. Whenever I start to get upset I just tell myself that it's not so bad for me, at least I am home. My heart aches for him everyday. But I wish sometimes he would realize how much stress I am under too. For the first time I am doing ALL of the house bills by myself, trying to get some sleep without worrying someone is going to break into the house, spend time with our dogs somewhere in my busy schedule, finish my Master's, and hold it together for the outside world. I know this stress is completely different from his, but the point is, we both have it. I make a point to be happy on the phone so he doesn't worry (It doesn't work all the time, but I try, ok) I just wish we could both do better sometimes. I know seeing him next week will help so much, but I can't rely on that. The next time I see him will be in 8 months. Seeing him will obviously not work during those 8 months since it won't be happening! I know this deployment will bring us closer, but it is hard to see that when you are in the middle of it.

Rock the Vote

I did rock it, this morning. I am feeling very American this morning. I was surprised how many people were actually there! I went around 10 am, when the morning news told me it would be a 'down' time, well, they were wrong! One lady in line behind me actually said, "Way to go America, look at how many people are here!" I laughed, but unfortunately, it's true. There are so many people who complain about the shape America is in, but do nothing about it. Election day is the one day where EVERYONE is the same. No one vote is more important than the next, they are all important.

Michael of course called to make sure I voted for the 'right' person, which, in his opinion, I didn't. We are voting opposite which makes the outcome very interesting. Let's just say we have a bet placed on the winner, and I am not able to tell you the actual bet. ;) I better win! I also got to see one of our friends Michael knows from the Guard. It was nice to catch up with him, since the last time I saw him was at Michael's going away party. Michael actually called while I was there, and they got to say HI to each other, so that was nice. It was wonderful to see so many people, young and old, out casting their vote.

Only 12 more hours or so and we will know! Did you vote today?

I Quit!

Nothing serious, just the FRG. I have never quit anything in my life, so this was a very hard decision for me. I originally joined because I wanted to be involved while Michael left, and get all of the information first! I also thought being a part of this group would be beneficial for Michael in his upcoming promotion. I should have listened to my husband! He was right when he warned me. Although this group of women certainly do mean well, they drive me crazy. I know this is mean to say, but I am a very organized woman, this group is not. I was POC on the phone tree, and received a phone call yesterday telling me they wanted to test it. This would be hard to do considering there are 115 members in the unit, I am the only one making phone calls, and there is no 'tree' set up yet. I schedule events month in advance because I am so busy, but they continuously change dates making it difficult to even attend the Executive Committee Meetings. I will still attend the monthly meetings they provide for the rest of the families, but I am no longer on the Executive Committee. I am actually pretty proud of myself for saying 'No' for once!

Welcome November

If you know anything about me, you should know that this time of year is my absolute favorite! I love watching the trees change color, the air is finally getting cold, and I get to set our all of my fall decorations. This year I am also celebrating because it has already been one month! Only 11 more to go. I really can't believe it. It has flown by - Don't get me wrong, I have had some rough days, but overall not too bad. I really think this is because I do have something to look forward to next week. Michael will be home in 10 days! I am so excited to see him!

Seeing him is going to bring many mixed emotions! On the night he comes home, myself, his best man, and mom are going up to get him. Michael wanted someone to drive with me and he asked our good friend to go with me. He has been great the last month, checking on me and always letting the boys out when I need him too (It's hard by yourself!) I know Michael misses him and is excited to see him. It will be one crowded car! I know there are so many things he wants to do, and I am worried we won't be able to fit them all in, or we will rush around so much it will turn into a stressful weekend. Oh well, I will just be happy to spend time with him.

This coming week is going to be great! We have off for election day on Tuesday, half day on Thursday, then next week, off on Tuesday for Veterans Day and then I have off Thursday and Friday to spend with Michael! What a great two weeks.

World Champs!

Last night the Phillies won Game 5 to Clinch the series, 4-3! We can now say that a Philly team has won a world championship (in the last 28 years!!). It is so exciting - I briefly thought about going to the parade, and then thought that was just crazy! Too many people....it will be fun to watch on T.V. though!

We also had our LAST hockey game tonight :( Varsity lost which makes getting into the tournament questionable, but my girls crushed the other team 4 - 0! It was a great end to a great season!

I also found out Michael will be home a day earlier then expected, which means only 12 days to go! His flight is coming in around 10:30 the night before, which is great because that gives us a whole extra day. I can't wait...

Crazy Day!

At first, when the Phillies game was postponed last night, I was very upset. It was rescheduled fr 8 pm tonight, and tonight was my first night of my last class! Needless to say, I would have missed it - but luckily, the weather is still crappy, and it was postponed another day! I have some good luck today!

I am also losing it apparently. I swear I signed up for a class that was 20 minutes south of me. So after my hockey game, I hauled a** down there because I was already an hour late. I get there, and run to the board to check which classroom it is being held in - needless to say it wasn't, I drove to the wrong campus! Instead, I had signed up for a class that was 25 minutes NORTH of me. So I had to drive 45 minutes to class, and instead was an hour and forty five minutes late! Oh well, one class down, six to go!!

I also heard from Michael that he completed his ABS interview and is official eligible for promotion. In three weeks I can't call him LT anymore, and somehow CPT just doesn't sound as good. I guess I will have to actually say the full rank, Captain. Congratulations! I love you and am so proud of you.

Chain Letters

Now I know the person who sent this to me meant well. I received in my inbox today, a chain letter whose title was "Very Sobering." As I opened it, I knew it was going to be hard to read because she started the letter with : This is isn't meant to offend anyone or drudge up politics, it is meant to support the troops. As you scroll down through the letter, there are pictures of soldiers and then comparisons to selfish people in everyday life, and the life of a soldier. For example, "You are angry because your class ran five minutes over; He is told he will be over an extra two months." or "You hug and kiss your girlfriend, like you do everyday, He holds his letter close and smells his love's perfume." I mean really?

I think this is a great example for people who don't have loved ones serving. They can truly think about their own life and what they take for granted. Unfortunately, for those who have loved ones serving - we don't need reminders. I think about what I have with my husband everyday and I miss him every single minute he is gone. Although this letter was well intended, I instead cried like a baby (Yes, I am emotional, and everyone knows that! Michael tells me constantly!)

Jealous

This will be a two part post tonight, because there are two VERY different things I would like to talk about. FIRST, and most importantly - it is Game 5 of the World Series tonight, and my Pop called to inform me that he had tickets. Needless to say, I am insanely jealous! He was lucky enough to attend the World Series in 1980 the same night they clinched it with his friend. Now, 28 years later, he is attending with the same friend. He has decided it is destiny since tonight is also the night the Phillies can clinch the series. He is so excited, and told me to look for him - He would be the guy in red waving a white towel!

GO PHILS!!!!! Philadelphia has been waiting 28 years for this, and I have been patiently waiting for 24 of them!!

Stormy Saturday

I love rainy days. They make me just want to bundle up and stay in bed all day. Since my husband isn't home and I don't have anyone to cuddle with (although Rocky is a big baby), and I am still in hockey season, my stormy Saturday was started at 6:30 when my alarm went off for practice. You may be wondering how we can practice in the rain - well it's possible thanks to our wonderful turf field! Although I love it, this fact kills me sometimes! I also had the opportunity to eat lunch with my mother in law, father in law and aunt in law (?) at a VFW lunch that was offered for the families of Michael's unit. We had a great time, and am sorry to say that I didn't see many families there. This organization is going out of our way to help us during a deployment and families don't respond! This bothers me...oh well, I can't control what others do!

I am also happy. elated, overjoyed, to report that my BIG PAPER is FINISHED! Words cannot describe how I feel! It is like a huge weight off my back, and now that's one less thing I have to have in the back of my mind when Michael comes home!

On a side note, my Phils are 1-1 in the series but are on again tonight, baring a rain delay! Go Philly!

Ice Cube

This is what I am right now. Our hockey game just got over, and even though it is only October, it is COLD in the North!!! I am trying to de-thaw before round 2 of the Phillies! I am proud to report they were victorious as of 12:03 last night (or should I say, this morning!) I have been having problems falling asleep since Michael left, so staying up this late wasn't as hard as I thought it would be! Now on two Game 2, hopefully I can do it again tonight. I am not really teaching this week anyway since my kids have the state test. A little bit of coffee and I should be good to go. Besides, it's the WORLD SERIES!!!

I am also proud to report that as of today, I have successfully completed 30 credits towards my Master's! (This is a pay raise, so I am stoked) I also have a 4.0 average, better than my husbands 3.67 HA. I have one class to go that starts on Tuesday, and to finish my BIG paper. I am happy to report that on my BIG paper I only have to write a conclusion, make a few graphs, and do a table of contents. I plan on being finished by Sunday! WOW. I will graduate in December, and even though Michael has also graduated and likes to say he did it first - our diploma's will have the same date. Nice try Hon. Exciting times around here. I am happy to say it's been a good week!

Phillies!!!

With my crazy schedule, I can't believe I forgot to write about this! I have been a Philly fan since I can remember. It didn't matter what team it was from Philly, I was cheering for them. I have had to deal with the Eagles getting to the BIG game, but choking among others such as the Flyers. But I have always had a favorite - The Phillies. And now, they are at the BIG GAME. I am so excited words cannot describe it. I have a Phillies flag hanging in my classroom, and I even broke dress code and wore a Phillies shirt with jeans today. It's our year this time! I can feel it. Poor Michael doesn't have a TV, so hopefully he can find one tonight! Game 1 is about to start - I have a cold beer, HD thanks to Michael and I am ready to go! Go Phils!!!!!

Three Weeks

Unfortunately we haven't even reached the three week milestone in our long separation, but three weeks is when I will get to see Michael! His brigade will have pass for four days before they leave for Kuwait and then on to Iraq. I cannot wait to see him! I love talking to him everyday and seeing him on our video cam, but it just isn't the same has hugging him. I know, too mushy but sorry! At first I was going to fly down to see him, because I was worried about the stress traveling would have on him and honestly, I really just wanted to spend time alone with him and I. I was afraid (and still am) that if he came home, it would turn into a crazy circus of trying to see everyone again.

When push came to shove, I know he really did want to come home, and we do get to save a lot of money and best of all I don't have to fly by myself! (If you know anything about me, you know I HATE to fly and even had a panic attack on the way home from our honeymoon! ) Lovely. Even though I am going to love having him home, and so will our 'kids', I am still afraid of the whirlwind those four days could turn into. I know I am being completely selfish, but I really want him to myself. Isn't that awful? I love his family and mine, but I want it to be just him and I. I really do feel bad saying that, but it is true. I can't help it. He did tell his mom that he wasn't going out of his way to see everyone. If they wanted to see him, they would have to come to him, but we will see.

Either way, I have at least a short term goal in mind, and because of that I can get through the next month. After that, he won't have leave until June probably, so goodness knows how I am going to get through that. I guess we will cross that bridge when we come to it. Until then, I can't wait to see my LT in three....

Just not the Same

Well, it's been another crazy week! Two hockey games, with one player who received a broken nose :(, meeting with my professor about a paper I haven't written yet (yeah, the BIG paper that lets me graduate in two months), crazy school with my students as always. The good news is, another week down. That brings the count up to two! Only 50 more to go! I must say the last two weeks have flown by. I can't believe it's been two weeks already....On a sad note, it's only been two weeks. There is so much more still left. I just need to give myself something to look forward to - in four weeks I may get to see him in Texas! But more on that later.

Tonight I got to go out to eat and to the slots with Michael's parents! We went out with them a lot while Michael was still here. We always had a routine of going out to the casino. You could say Michael may be addicted. Even if we lose money (which, I must say, is most of the time) we still have a lot of fun. Even though I was happy to get out of the house and spend time with his parents, I have to say it just wasn't the same. I think about him all the time regardless, but I miss him even more when I am around things that we used to do together. I know we did everything together, but I guess I miss the traditions, if that's what you would call them. I know he will be home before I know it, but I still miss him terrible. I know this year will definitely make us much closer. How can it not? If someone doesn't appreciate their spouse after a separation like this, then I don't think they ever will. Until that day, I will patiently wait for November and what is to come next!

Imagine wanting him to leave....

I was able to talk with the wife of an officer that Michael has become good friends with last Friday. It was so nice to talk to someone who is going through the same thing. She called just to see how I was doing, which was so nice of her. Even though she lives an hour away, it would be nice to get together at some point. I love all of my friends, and they have been so great through everything, but it is also nice to talk to someone who just knows how it is, and if you have had a crappy day can truly relate.

During our conversation, she mentioned the FRG meeting that I had to miss on Thursday (someday my schedule will calm down, I swear!) The topic was the emotional cycle of a deployment. I was kind of glad I missed, because I had already been through this briefing once! Anyway, she said that some wives actually talked about how they were ready and wanted their husbands to go because they were starting to 'get on their nerves.' Both Major's wife and myself were shocked to say the least. How can someone say that? I prayed and prayed the day would never come and here these wives wanted their husbands to go? How can you want to send someone you love away to war for a year? I keep putting it into italics because I just don't understand it. It makes me so mad and upset for the soldier to hear that their wives would say that. I told her it was a good thing I wasn't there because I probably would have said something they wouldn't have liked to hear! Who says something like that? If I go to a FRG event, I hope Major's wife is there so we can keep each other calm when these wives are so....what word do I want? Stupid...Insensitive...Ignorant? All of the above?

Meanwhile, I know I cursed technology a few days ago, but that technology allowed me to see my husband last night! Our video cameras worked, and although a little blurry, I could still see him. He looked fantastic, and hasn't changed! Still multi-tasking on the web while talking. God, I love and miss him! I used to get on him about being on his laptop all night instead of watching TV, but now I don't care if he didn't TALK to me all night, as long as he was in the house! Those wives can take it and shove it. We will see who has the stronger relationship at the end of this year.

I am a Genius

I have fixed the Internet!!! A small triumph for me....As you may know, Michael is the technological genius. He can fix almost anything related to the computer. I am pretty good when it comes to PC's, but Michael is an Apple boy. I have also been switched to loving Apple's but I have no idea how to troubleshoot them. Whenever our internet goes loopy, which isn't uncommon, Michael can always fix it. Well, Lord only knows what I did tonight, but it came back on and now I can write one of my papers tomorrow. The problem is, I hauled the computer out to the loft to try to troubleshoot there because Michael convinced me he had done it before, and now I am afraid to move it back. What if the internet goes out again? I couldn't tell you what I did to fix it, but I am afraid to move it. If I post again by tomorrow, then you know it was a success! Maybe I actually can survive this deployment now!

I hate Technology

Normally, I love it. It helps me keep in touch with Michael, do papers for school and blog on here. As of right now, I have no internet at home. Fun. Michael has taught me how to unplug the modem, let it sit and then plug it all back in. Normally that does the trick. After that didn't work, I called Comcast. This back up ALWAYS works! Well, needless to say, the signal to the modem was fantastic and I think it's a computer problem. They tried to talk me through it, but they were talking in PC language, and we have a Mac. An hour later, it still didn't work and I was in tears because this is something Michael can always fix. I talked to him on the phone and he was upset for me. I feel bad because I don't want to bother him with us, but without it I can't get work done for school or talk to him (besides on the phone). Ahhhh, very annoying to say the least. If you have any suggestions let me know!

Keeping Busy

So I was convinced, that since I was so busy this falls, between field hockey, school and finishing my Master's, when Michael left I would be fine. And I am busy - today I got up at 5:45 (I have to now let the dog's out and feed them, which use to be Michael's job), then got ready for my day. I had a staff meeting after school, running to the bank at lunch because after school I had hockey, and then had to run thirty minutes up north to have a meeting with my professor. Well, she didn't show up until six due to traffic, so of course, I didn't get home until around 7. Then I took Rocky for a run, fed the animals, took a shower and finally ate dinner around 8. Whew...now that is busy (and I am exhausted...if only I could sleep). Now one would think that this would keep my mind off of Michael - I was wrong again. Instead, during all of this craziness, I found myself thinking about him every single minute of the day, and I am not exaggerating. I literally don't think there was a minute that I didn't think about him - wondering what he was doing, if he was alright, if he was missing me as much I was missing him. I was apart from him during my four years at college, but I never felt like this during our time apart. Maybe it's because I know where he is going, or because I don't really know when I will see him again. In college I always had an end date...it was never more than a month away. I know I should see him again next month at some point (hopefully), but after that it could be six months. Talk about depressing. Here is my advice to everyone out there - hug your husband, fiance, boyfriend as much as humanly possible, and don't fight about stupid things - in the end it doesn't matter.

On a side note, I have started counting weeks instead of days due to the depressing factor of a number over 100. Instead of 360 days to go, we have 52 weeks. A little bit better!

362

The deployment technically started on October 2nd, so if you think about it, three days have passed already. Michael already told me I should count weeks and not days, it can be too depressing. Last night, or should I say this morning, at 2:15, the soldiers were rounded up and put on the bus. I have to say, besides having family members pass away, saying good-bye to him was the worst moment of my life. It took all my energy not to get in my car and drive after the bus that was taking my husband away. At the moment, he is on a plane to Chicago and then to Texas. Every minute, getting farther and farther away from me. Let's hope the year flies by because right now, it seems almost impossible to go without him for that long.

The Morning Came

Last night, as we were laying in bed, I told Michael I couldn't sleep, and he asked why, I said because I didn't want to. I figured it would take longer for today to get here. Michael's response, "As much as I don't want it to come, the morning is coming." And here we are. I am just 2 hours and 45 minutes away from taking him to the unit. I have held it together pretty good - until today that is. He bought me roses, which of course made me cry, then he gave me three of my favorite movies and the new Nicholas Sparks book I wanted. The card I can't even talk about without tearing up. I read in a deployment handbook that no matter how long you prepare for it, the moment of departure will always be filled with emotion. I am dreading this moment. He has to report by 12 am, with the buses leaving at 3 am. It is going to be a long night.

October Welcome

Nine months ago, when the Michael came home from that weekend drill with his 'wonderful' announcement, I thought October was forever away, and we would be fine. Now it's September 30th, and only four wake-ups away from the BIG day. Where did the time go? Maybe if I was like the little kids at Christmas, who actually WANTED it to come, it would have taken longer...instead it has flown by. Just two weeks ago I was still assuring myself I had plenty of time, we would be fine. Perhaps reality is starting to sink in.

People keep asking me what I am going to do. The truth is I don't know. Sure I am finishing my Master's and I coach hockey, but what about when I get home. I love having my dogs greet me at the door, but nothing is like Michael yelling down, "Hey Babe." Michael hasn't left yet and my sleepless nights have already begun. I can't sleep because I don't want to. Maybe if I sleep less, midnight on Sunday will take longer to get here. I keep playing all the possible scenarios through my head : I will get there and they will change their mind, they won't let them go because a prominent member of the community is going with me. And then I realize that their minds don't get changed, and there are man other prominent members already fighting for our country. I guess time will tell. Until then, I will cherish every moment. Tomorrow he has off and we are actually going to eat lunch together. Something we don't get to do unless it's the weekend!

One Week...

Yesterday, we had Michael's going away party. We were able to have a great night with family and friends. I was stressed with the bad weather we have been having, and how everyone would be able to fit into our house, but I have to say it turned out really well. Ever the planner, I made sure I had enough food and beer to make everyone happy. This turned out to be an understatement considering we have enough of both still to last at least a week!

This time next week, I will be alone and our year will have begun. I can't believe how the 9 months have flown since we found out. I kept telling myself not to worry because it was such a long way away, and not it is almost here and I can't bring myself to think about it. I take the time we spend together for granted. Like I will always wake up next to him in the morning, and come home to him at night, get my kiss before I fall asleep, or get my hugs everyday. I am going to miss him terribly. I have been keeping myself together so far, of which I am quite proud of. I am hoping I can make it one more week. I keep telling myself this is much harder for him, and I have to stay strong to help him, but who are we kidding. I know this week will fly by no matter how much I don't want it to.

Updates and Countdowns

Ok, so I have been a HORRIBLE updater lately and I apologize. Things are starting to get a little hectic around here. School is crazy, love my kids, but school is still crazy. My Master's is underway again, to say the least. Driving up to Newark on Wednesdays is not my idea of a FUN time. I just keep telling myself only three more months of it and I AM FINISHED my Master's. On the countdown front....only two weeks. What am I going to do with myself?

We went shopping today for items for his party. That is going to be held next Saturday at our house. Now our house isn't that big, but our back yard is a decent size so we were going to bring in tables and have the party out there. Well, of course, there is rain in the forecast, so Lord only knows what we will do then. I guess at the end of the day it doesn't matter, as long as Michael is having fun and gets to spend time (and drink) with his friends. I am hoping everyone will have a great time.

Hurricane Hannah

Normally, I would be upset a Hurricane was coming our way, but I have to say, I am not upset today. Really it's just a bad rain storm, and I received a text this morning at 6:10, saying our 7:00 practice was canceled. I have had a cold for over a week now, and thanks to my mono, my immune system is shot and I can't seem to beat it. All I really need is sleep. Since my busy schedule doesn't allow that, I was relieved that I got to sleep in this morning. I even slept in until around 10:30! If you know me at all, that is like 3:00 pm to a normal person, as I am normally am up around 7:30. I needed it ! Right now as I sit here typing ( I should be typing a paper for class) I realize I can probably even take a nap.

I love rainy days! It is perfect for cuddling up on the couch and watching a movie. It would be even better if Michael was here, but he is hard at work of course. I asked the stupid question the other day if it was really bad, could he stay home? Thinking of course they would cancel due to danger of driving in the storm. Stupid me, the military HELPS in the time of a crisis. If anything, he would be called in for longer. Oh well, as of now it isn't that bad, and I should have a cuddling partner in time for dinner and Saturday night tv!

Until then, I need to make some coffee and actually stay awake so I can get some work done! Stay dry!

Being Selfish

As I have said before, I always think more about the upcoming deployment when I attend the FRG meetings. I should have known this would happen, but I volunteered anyway as a way to stay up to date in case my husband decides not to share information with me. I am also convinced it looks good for him. Anyway, I was at a training meeting for my position in the unit when we started to get on the subject of the soldier's actual departure. There is a departure ceremony for the public, but there was supposed to be a more intimate ceremony for just family. That has been thrown out the window due to flight times and other things. Needless to say, I will be dropping him off around 3 in the morning that day and saying goodbye. We discussed who was to be brought to the unit during this time. They said it was left up to us. Here is where the selfish part comes in. I know that his family would probably love to come up there that day. The loving wife wants all of his loved ones there and understands he probably wants to say goodbye to them one last time. The selfish wife wants her husband all to herself. Is it entirely selfish of me to want to say goodbye to him by myself? I want to spend that moment with him, before he gets on that bus, hug him, kiss him, tell him how proud I am of him and how much I love and will miss him, without having to turn around and face his family. I want to watch that bus drive away and then probably burst into tears by myself. I know there will be other people there, but I feel like they will understand what I am going through better then his family. Don't get me wrong, I know they will miss him on many different levels, but I think a wife's feelings are different. The other wives will understand how I am feeling at that moment. I don't know how to entirely put it into words, but I know that I want to share that moment with him. Of course, the final decision will be left up to him, and I wouldn't want to take that away from him, but is it wrong to hope?

So as I am feeling selfish on this Friday night, my husband is up at the unit working and I am unselfishly doing his laundry. Hopefully, it will help my subconcious selfish self feel better!

27 Years...But who's counting?

27 is the number of years I have left until I can retire. Isn't that sad? I haven't even really begun my career as a teacher and already I am counting the years. I love my students and I love teaching. I really do look forward to getting up every morning - even at 6:00 am! The kids are hilarious, even if they can get on your nerves, and everyday really does bring a surprise. No two days are the same, and the kids can always say something to make you smile. Unfortunately, I despise everything that comes along with teaching. The meetings, the paperwork, dealing with parents who know everything, and the paperwork. It seems every year our district adds crap on top of our ever increasing workload just because they can. Isn't it enough that I plan for hours to make sure my children succeed? Is it really necessary to add all the crap on top of it?

Michael left for work this morning up at the unit, and I have to say I was jealous. He doesn't have to write lesson plans or deal with anymore of our districts surprise plans. I wonder what happened to our administrators. When did they forget how long it takes to plan for a class and how much time it actually consumes? I love my job, but for the next month I refuse to neglect my husband. Maybe after October I will spend more time on the crap they make us do. Until they I will concentrate on Michael and making sure I teach my students what they need. The BS will have to wait.

Autumn

Even though it is still 85 degrees outside, it is now the month of September. Therefore, to me it is fall. I love fall....the colors, the pumpkins the coolness in the air. Since it is September, today I spent the day getting out all of my fall decorations. I am pretty sure my husband thinks I am crazy, and is annoyed by the scarecrow decoration I bought today and promptly displayed, but I don't care. I also got my garden ready today. I also plant mums in the fall. I love them! Again, it's a color thing. With Michael's farewell party coming up at the end of the month, I figure I better get a jump on things so I don't have to do everything at once. I figured this weekend and next I would tackle the outside....with grass and flowers being planted, and then I can concentrate on the inside. I guess at the end of the day, no one will really care what my house looks like at the time of the party as they will be concentrating on Michael, but my OCD personality just can't quit.

Meanwhile, we had the opportunity on Saturday night to attend a Signal Honors Dinner. It was interesting to say the least. I had a lot of fun, and I think Michael did too. Dressing up is always fun, and when they cut the cake with a sword...well that was just interesting. The military has some weird rituals!

Classes start this week...just one more thing to add to my non-stop schedule. I need to sit down and make a schedule of when I am going to get things accomplished. I need to make sure I spend a lot of time with Michael too. We are quickly running out of time........

Lazy Sundays

I absolutely love Sundays. Michael and I have a nice routine - we wake up, try to attend church, breakfast and pick up the Sunday paper. I always look through the Life section along with the ads, and Michael reads everything else! We then go to his Grandparents for dinner and then relax the rest of the night. When Mike leaves I guess I will have to go to WaWa and pick out just my sections and leave the rest! Today, on our trip to Wal-Mart (which feels like a daily event) I found Who's the Boss Season 1 on DVD. Did anyone else watch this? I LOVE this show. I was very excited, and needless to say, I have been watching it all day. Little things amuse me anymore. I hope everyone else had a nice relaxing Sunday!

It's Official

We are back in school! We started yesterday, and things have gotten busy very quickly. I guess it always seems that way when you start a new school year. There are so many things to do in such a short amount of time! We have three days of in-service before students come back on Thursday. We have only had one day to ourselves in our classrooms and the rest are filled with meetings and trainings, yay! (Note the sarcasm.) Hockey just started on Friday and already we have a scrimmage tomorrow, so we will see how that goes. It will be interesting to say the least. I am going to try to keep posting here since we are getting so close to the deployment, but since we are so busy right now it may not be as often. I will do my best. This really has been an outlet for me and I enjoy posting!

Back to School

I can't believe it - the summer is over! Today is our last day off before we head back to school. Time really does fly. I guess it doesn't help that I was in school until July 22, but still....I guess I am ready to go back. I always like meeting my new students and getting everything off to a fresh start. I am sure by February the excitement will wear off. Michael is only going to be in school for 7 days before he goes on orders - lucky guy. So he has nothing to complain about!

We got to spend our last summer weekend with some good friends. Doug and Maria came down to spend some time with us. They used to work in the district with us, but after an unfortunate turn of events, they had to leave us :( We were happy to see them and had a great time! It will be interesting to see how I react when my alarm goes off at 6:15 tomorrow morning!

Marriage

My marriage is wonderful. I know it's a cliche, but I really do love him more now then I ever have. When I look at him, I am so thankful I have him and still get chills when he kisses me or touches me. Is that too much information? Anyway, with the upcoming deployment, I guess I am scared that this year will change us somehow. We just got married last year, and our relationship is amazing. It's not fair that we already have to be separated for a year and that everything may change. I have read articles and watched shows that say when soldiers come home they are never the same. Now granted, they are talking about soldiers who see hard combat. I am praying that Michael will not have to see any of this, let alone fire his weapon. I guess there is no telling how someone is affected until they come home. Perhaps I should worry about him actually leaving first.

I was thankful that they were having a ceremony the day before the unit actually left. Michael told me they planned this so family and friends wouldn't have to watch the buses leave. His mom told me that was the hardest part of the last deployment. I have now been informed by the FRG leader that they are having a ceremony on the day of as well. I guess the ceremony the day before is expected to draw a big crowd since it is in a public venue and it is an election and a prominent member of the judicial branch is deploying with the unit. Therefore, they have decided to hold an additional ceremony for family and friends on the day of. I expected just to drop him off and have a private moment with him before he went inside of the building. I guess that idea is out the window. I am sure I will be fine, it's just another event that makes this deployment very very real, and very, very close.

Pretzel Salad vs. Me

Well, the pretzel salad has won this battle 2 - 1. For some reason I have difficulty mastering this dessert. I wanted to make it for a gathering we had with some friends from school, which was last night. I learned the last time I messed up the salad that it was necessary to let the first layers of pretzel cool entirely before applying the cream cheese and whip cream mixture. So I waited patiently. I even put it in the refrigerator, went to work, and then did the second layer. Well, after 20 minutes of waiting, I peeked in the fridge, and the third layer, consisting of Jell-o and strawberries, was somehow underneath the second layer. Needless to say, the pretzel salad was ruined.

So, early Friday morning, I woke up and tried it again. Michael insisted I just make something else, but I was going to eat pretzel salad one way or the other. I laid the first layer, waited, then applied the second, then waited again. This time, instead of pouring on boiling hot Jell-o, I waited for it to cool a bit, and then gently spooned it on. It worked!! I have to remember this technique for future use!

We had a lot of fun with our friends last night. They made a delicious dinner and then Karlin and I got our behinds kicked in a game of pool volleyball. For the record, she is pregnant and I think the boys were cheating! We also go to meet the new member of the Wells family, little Parker, born on July 29th. Very cute indeed!

Mark your Calendars

October 3. This is the day the unit is having their deployment ceremony. I guess the time is getting close if they are planning that :( Michael was mad at me because I questioned their venue choice but I feel as though it was a legit concern. They have decided to have the ceremony in an area where there is no parking. With at least 115 members in the unit, there has to be at least 500 friends and family attending. Instead, these family and friends should park about 5 minutes away and will be bused to the location. To me this is a waste of time. Do they have any idea how long this is going to take. Let's pray they are smart enough to have more then one bus. What about people who are late? Are they going to continuously run buses? Why wouldn't they just have the ceremony in an area where there is parking and seating for the elderly. (They have to bring in chairs as there is no seating either). Leave it to the Army to plan this event. Did they think of all the logistical nightmares this plan entails? The OCD in me cringes at the very thought of it. Now granted, Michael informed me this location was chosen because of its significance - the unit was started in this area. But at the end of the day, who is really going to care about this fact? Not me.

Meanwhile, on a lighter note, I have cooked dinner for the second night in a row! Lasagna, from scratch none the less. Even my cooking goddess, Robin was impressed when she phoned from N.C. I still can't decorate a cake as good as she can though!

It is also Mom and Pop's Anniversary! Happy 31st and many more. We love you!

Content

I guess that is how you could describe life these days. Mike has one more day of work at the unit before he can enjoy his last week and a half off. I work one more week and then can enjoy about 4 days before school begins. Life is good. Michael is currently sleeping next to me while I watch Generation Kill on HBO. It is actually a pretty good mini-series which chronicles a marine unit in Iraq. Besides the point.

I also attempted to cook dinner tonight. I think I did a pretty nice job! I cooked filet, crabcakes (from scratch), broccoli and corn. Even better, I was able to time it all perfectly and it was ready as Michael walked through the door from work. Not bad after a day of work if I do say so myself!

"You're used to this...."

Let me tell you something. I don't care that I am married to an Army officer, and that he leaves to go to school, or training for weeks at a time. That doesn't mean I am 'used to it.' I had this comment from a colleague a week ago. She was telling me the story of how her husband was gone for five days and she was just devastated. It was the longest they had been apart since they were married and she was complaining about how hard it was to be apart for those days. She made the comment to me that I was 'used to it' so she was sorry for complaining. No matter how many nights I have spent away from my husband, I have never gotten 'used to it.' I still miss him terribly and have sleepless nights when I hear something creaking or the dog's ears perk up. I CAN get used to sleeping next to him. To waking up to him cuddling up next to me because I 'am sooo warm.' And to him kissing me before he leaves in the morning. I don't think anyone can get used to sleeping alone. I know I can't. So meanwhile, perhaps my colleague should thank God that it's just five nights, and not five weeks or a year.

Sorry, I am done venting now! Everyone once in awhile it needs to be done. I don't want this site to be all of my venting, but I always feel much better afterwards. I will do my best to mix in some very happy posts as well!

Disney!

Disney was amazing as always! Just seeing the castle sends you back to when you were 7 years old and anything was possible. We had a lot of fun and took some great pictures. If I can figure out how to work it maybe I can put some on here, who knows!

Now it's back to work. It won't be as bad though, with only having to worry about work at the restaurant. No more summer school or class! I actually don't have much time at the restaurant left either! Teachers go back to school on the 18th, so my last weekend will be the weekend before. I plan on going back just to stay busy while Michael is gone, but not until I am finished my Master's in December. I have a lot of work to do between now and then! I am also excited because hockey starts on August 15th. I super excited for this season because we have a turf field! It is going to be awesome!

Although starting a new year is always exciting, it is also getting very close to Michael's departure date. It is starting to become all too real so we will see how the next few weeks go. Hope all is well with everyone!

5 Days and a Wake Up

On a lighter note, only 5 days and a wake up until Disney! Which also means only two more days of summer school, one Master's class and 4 shifts of work left! I can't wait!

Stop Loss

I have this morning off, so I finally have the opportunity to watch Stop Loss. I am only about 20 minutes in but so far it is very interesting. It really does a good job of capturing the stress soldiers go through. I know it is a movie, but it is really scary the type of things soldiers experience after they come home from a war. Now the soldiers in the movie were knocking down doors, as Mike likes to say, and saw the type of action that will definitely cause nightmares at night. Michael will NOT, I repeat NOT be doing those missions. (This is what he tells me, and if I find out otherwise, well, he may not make it there.) I just pray that this is all over soon. Too many families and people are being affected. Don't get me wrong, I am more proud of my husband then anything, and I respect the job he does, but I love having him here and not half a world away.

Add it to the List

I received a great surprise on Saturday (I know you can't tell online, but I am being extremely sarcastic). I went to the doctor last week with a nasty cold. I received medicine and took it religiously for 7 days. I felt good for about a day and a half and then it came back on Thursday full force. I decided to try to wait it out, but by Saturday morning I had had enough and went to my doctor. (Thank goodness for new walk-in hours on the weekend!) She was surprised that my cold came back after seven days of medicine, so she gave me another prescription and a slip to get some blood work done. Surprisingly, the labs did not take forever like they normally do, and came back yesterday afternoon - even the doctor was shocked at the quickness of it! My lovely doctor informed me that I don't just have a simple cold, I also have mono. Seriously. I know I have been doing a lot recently, but I am only a week and a half away from vacation. The next week and a half are my busiest with my class wrapping up (so of course final papers are due), summer school wrapping up and work. Oh well. I guess I will just rest when I can and take naps. I also pray I didn't give it to Michael! He definitely doesn't need it! Pray for me!

Vacation Needed

I know I keep saying this, but I really, really need a vacation! Between the stress of trying to figure out my schedule for this Fall with me Master's (I WILL GRADUATE come hell or high water) and finishing summer school while still working at Meding's and finishing the class I am taking this summer, I am exhausted and I think my body has noticed. I have been sick the past two weeks :( (I will NOT be sick in Disney, Mickey won't allow it) Anyway, I was watching T.V. this morning, and my favorite show Jon and Kate plus 8 was on (Robin will appreciate this). This episode chronicled their trip to Disney. I feel like my husband and I are 8 years old again. I am constantly on websites searching for information about our trip ( I have been there a million times, but it can't hurt). He has been calling me from work to inform me that numbers there are down so maybe it won't be so crowded, and to discuss how we should pack (1 big suitcase or 2?). I recently discovered that our resort, Caribbean Beach, has the same beer that Michael loved on our honeymoon! I guess I could have expected that since it is Disney, and they do so well at immersing you in the fantasy. Our resort also has hammocks! I cannot wait to lie on the beach in a hammock listening to the steel drum music...and of course visit the Magic Kingdom. Only 12 days to go!!!

Coloring

It is my new hobby. The other day at work I was bored and trying to kill time and discovered a coloring book. I forgot how much fun it could be, not to mention relaxing. In honor of our upcoming trip to Disney (only 18 days to go!) I recently bought a Disney coloring book! I figured it would keep me busy for the next few weeks and entertained on the flight. So the next time you are stressed, don't worry, simply buy yourself a coloring book of your favorite character and color your stress away. I recommend the big 64 box of crayons for a wide variety of colors!

Miserable People

There are some people in this world who are just miserable no matter how nice you are to them. These people annoy me. While waiting tables, I normally come across people who are unhappy, I expect this. Normally, there is something wrong with their food. On Saturday, I waited on one of these people. I took out their soup, and then asked later how it was. They informed me it was the worst Cream of Crab they have ever had. I apologized and took it off their bill since they only had had one bite. Then I took their appetizer, stuffed mushrooms. When I asked how those were, there response was, "Simply ok." Alright, I thought for sure that the meal would be good. Our crab cakes are awesome and so it our stuffed flounder, both dishes they had ordered. Again, when I inquired about their meal, this was their response : "We have lived here for four years and have driven past here many times, let me put it this way, we will keep driving from now on." Seriously. How pleasant. All I could do was apologize and tell them to have a good weekend. Are there not other things that could be worse in life?

Happy 4th!

What could be more all-American then a baseball game and beer? That is how Michael and I spent our Fourth of July! We rode up with my parents and surprised my Nana in the morning. She was very excited to say the least. We haven't seen her since she was in the hospital recovering from open heart surgery in April, and it was not very reassuring to see her there. Talk about a night and day transformation! She looks amazing and is getting around (and talking) just like the old Nana! We left there in the afternoon and headed to the stadium. The Phillies played the Mets and because the two cities are relatively close, there were tons of Mets fans. They had their fun while they were up 2-0 but quickly closed their mouths when we returned with 2 runs in the next inning. It was awesome game which ended with the Phillies winning in the bottom of the 9th. There were no fireworks, to my dismay, but there were some in other parts of the city you could see from the stadium so it was perfect.

We hope all of the troops who spent the 4t overseas return home quickly and safely. We thank you for your dedication and sacrifice! To Courtney and Gabe (who are currently on a flight to St. Maarten, and I am insanely jealous!), we hope you have TONS of fun!

Wow

I believe this is the only word to describe our pre-deployment briefing today. We began the morning bright and early at around 8:00 in the morning and we went until around 2:00. It could have been longer I suppose, but trust me, it was long enough. There was some great information presented - just not for me of course. We don't use the military insurance thanks to our wonderful state benefits and many of the presentations were geared toward the soldiers themselves including VA benefits and the pay system over seas. I understand why this information is important but so much was on power point and I had had just about enough! Now normally I can sit through this, but for some reason it felt like my kidney's were shutting down. I couldn't even sit they hurt so bad. I went back and forth between standing and then laying the car (in the 96 degree heat of course). Needless to say it was a very long day, but on an upside I did get to spend it with my husband!

Military Design

I understand that our military is capable of great things. They have done an excellent job of protecting our country and coming to the aid of others. What they are not very good at is planning. Now you may say, "But how can that be when we are in a war. That obviously takes planning." And I would say, yes, one would think that. I have recently decided, however, that they plan nothing but still manage to look good. Michael is currently reporting to our unit everyday. This weekend, there is a family deployment briefing all day from 8 to 4:30. Michael was asked (by me) to RSVP to this event three weeks ago. Last week, while at training, he was asked again, and again responded, "My wife and I will be coming." ALSO last week, I received a phone call asking if we were attending. Now at this point I was still polite and told her yes and we had already responded twice. She of course apologized and said they just wanted to touch base with everyone. I understand this because I am a part of the Family Readiness Group (FRG), and it is hard to get everyone to respond, so I applaud their effort. I believe the last straw for Michael, was when they lined up everyone, and then went down the line and asked who was coming from every soldier's family. Now, Michael assures me he was nice, I think he probably responded nicely with the number again, but then lost it. He informed the lady we had now responded THREE times, to which she responded, "We are just double checking." Seriously?

Michael and I are both planners. If we are going somewhere, or we know something is coming up, events are planned to the last detail. Michael's 'vacation' to Iraq in July is in the middle of our summer. We planned everything around that trip. He couldn't buy 3 Doors Down tickets because he wouldn't be back, we couldn't leave for Disney until he got back, but we had to leave enough leeway in case his flight home was delayed. Yesterday, our lovely military told him he was no longer going. Now, secretly I am of course jumping up and down. The less travel time and time he spend there the safer he is. Michael is upset because of all the planning he had to do and the plans he had with the money he was going to make. Michael still would guarantee you he will get a phone call the day before saying he is going. We will have to wait and see. We will also see how this Saturday goes with the briefing. It should be interesting! Again, our military doing it's finest to plan.

Someday...

I wish that I could go back to 7th grade when summer was just that....summer. There was no work to be done, not bills to pay, just figuring out who was spending the night that day or what time we were getting together for Hide - n - Seek. Ashley, you remember those days! It was awesome. My friends and I spent all day at the pool playing categories, and getting a tan without even trying. Now it seems like summer is just an extra time to get some extra money either by doing summer school or working another job. What happened to enjoying summer? I know when I have kids I don't plan on working. (Plan is the optimal word here considering I don't know what our financial situation will be.) Michael and I are busting our behinds now so we can build our dream house when he gets back, and start our family. The extra money I am making is nice, don't get me wrong. Between his deployment and my second job, we will have a great down payment. It's not all bad. I do have some nights off (when I'm not at class trying to finish my Master's), and some days too. I still long for those pool side, lightening bug catching, sleep over summer times though.

Comment

I have my FIRST comment!! Thank you Bina! And yes, I loved seeing you this weekend I miss you very much. You should move up North. LOVE YOU

Back from N.C.

I had the most amazing weekend! My mom and I left around 6 AM on Friday and drove the 7 and a half hours down to Greensboro. (Bless this woman for going with me!) It was wonderful catching up with everyone and seeing them. We, of course had manicures and pedicures first, and then later the rehearsal and dinner. Saturday morning, our hair was done. I was terrified that my hair would turn into a puffy southern style, but thanks to my "Redneck" (her words, not mine) stylist, my hair was fabulous! We then had to kill around 4 hours in Courtney's swanky hotel room. You would think we were bored out of our minds, but we had the best time! These girls are so funny, and Courtney, through lack of sleep and nerves, was hilarious. I thought she would be a total mess, but she pulled it together and did beautifully through the ceremony. Gabe did wonderful as well and they are finally married! We wish them all the happiness in the world. When I came home yesterday, I discovered just how much I hate 95 and GPS systems. Let's just say 95 was PACKED and Mom's GPS decided to take us the scenic root through Washington instead of AROUND it. Needless to say, the ride home took around 8 hours instead of 7. Good times, but at least we got home safe and sound!

I also got to see Michael yesterday! His unit left the base a day early and actually came home on my birthday! He still has to report to the unit everyday, but gets to come home in the evening. I work 10 - 4 everyday so it works out great! I really missed him this weekend. I hate going to a wedding and not having anyone to dance with. I did really good until the last song when I started to tear up a bit. So I just removed myself from the situation and went to run stuff to my car instead. Sallie caught me in the hallway, and bless her, I didn't even have to tell her why, she just hugged me and said "Don't worry, he will be home soon." I love my friends. I don't even have to say a word and they always know how to reassure me.

Today is also Mom's birthday! Michael and I wish you a great, RELAXING, day! We love you!

The Need to Vent

I don't know if it's because I am exhausted or hungry, or both, but I feel the need to vent. First of all, I am traveling to North Carolina this weekend (which I am excited about because two good friends are getting married), but Michael will not be with me. I hate the Army. It forces us to put our lives on hold, or carry on like they aren't even there. It is so annoying. I waited 23 years to attend weddings with someone who I could dance with and introduce to everyone as my husband, but NO, the army has taken that from me. And will again, might I add, next March when Robin gets married and Michael cannot attend AGAIN. Yes I will have my Mom there, Lord love her, but it isn't the same. Am I proud of him for what he does? Of course, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Am I sometimes bitter? Yes. Not at him but definitely at the institution. Lord knows his unit comes before family. It's in their motto, so there is no arguing with this.

I also had class tonight. I actually like my professor, but any graduate class that require group work is annoying. It is impossible to get together outside of class, and frankly, I don't have the time. I wanted to sign up for a certain group, but wouldn't you know by the time it came to me it was full. So now, not only do I not want to do the group work to begin with, but now I am doing work I wasn't even interested in. Fabulous.

On an upside, two more days until I see my friends (Michael or not), and two more days until my birthday. Now Courtney and Gabe have no excuse for not remembering my birthday!