Friday, July 31, 2009
Will You....
Three years ago today, my husband and I were on a trip to Disney World, when he asked me to marry him! Love you!
I would post pictures we took but they are on his computer :(
I would post pictures we took but they are on his computer :(
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
300 Days
As of today, my husband has been deployed for 300 days. Can you believe that? I remember back in October, when I prayed I would be able to make it this far, I couldn't imagine going this long without him. But we have made it.
On the other hand, with 300 down, that means only 65 more to go!!!
On the other hand, with 300 down, that means only 65 more to go!!!
Monday, July 27, 2009
Loving You...
Last night I was watching one of my favorite (but very long) movies, Pearl Harbor. Yes, I know, with the main character switching love interests when she thinks her first love is dead in war, isn't the greatest thing, but I still love it.
There was one line that caught my attention, when she realizes her first love is alive, and they start talking. He says to her, "Loving you kept me alive."
Michael is the reason I have made it through this deployment. Without hearing his voice or his emails, I could have easily curled up in a ball and slept my way through this deployment (ok so maybe a glass of wine, or two, helped) Michael is the reason I got up every morning, tried to make the most of my day, and stayed positive.
I couldn't have done this with anyone else.
There was one line that caught my attention, when she realizes her first love is alive, and they start talking. He says to her, "Loving you kept me alive."
Michael is the reason I have made it through this deployment. Without hearing his voice or his emails, I could have easily curled up in a ball and slept my way through this deployment (ok so maybe a glass of wine, or two, helped) Michael is the reason I got up every morning, tried to make the most of my day, and stayed positive.
I couldn't have done this with anyone else.
Searching in Vain
I have been bugging Michael for weeks now to give up information relating to their homecoming time line and ceremonies. I want him out of that damn country as soon as possible, and back on the ground in America. I like knowing how long something is going to last, and when I will finally be able to breath again, without worrying every minute of the day.
A few days ago, the Brigade came out with their monthly newsletters. In this newsletter, there were briefs from the Commander and other leaders in the Brigade. Here, they mentioned that torch parties were already on the ground for other units, and other units were actively preparing for theirs to arrive. For those who don't know what torch parties are, it is not a luau in the backyard. Torch parties are individuals who are sent to sites before the rest of the unit to prepare for their arrival. Basically it's the beginning of the end of Michael's deployment, when their unit's torch party arrives.
This information has started to get me excited. I know which unit is replacing Michael, and I have been actively searching the internet for information related to their deployment, when they are leaving, and when their torch party will arrive. Of course, I can't find anything. Why would I? If Michael doesn't know (or claims he doesn't) then why would it be posted on the internet?
Isn't it awful that I am actively wishing this unit would arrive? This means that I am wishing this God awful deployment on another family. I'm sorry, I am just sick of our deployment, and would give anything to know an end date. Or at least a week long window of some sort.
I can't wait to have my husband home.
A few days ago, the Brigade came out with their monthly newsletters. In this newsletter, there were briefs from the Commander and other leaders in the Brigade. Here, they mentioned that torch parties were already on the ground for other units, and other units were actively preparing for theirs to arrive. For those who don't know what torch parties are, it is not a luau in the backyard. Torch parties are individuals who are sent to sites before the rest of the unit to prepare for their arrival. Basically it's the beginning of the end of Michael's deployment, when their unit's torch party arrives.
This information has started to get me excited. I know which unit is replacing Michael, and I have been actively searching the internet for information related to their deployment, when they are leaving, and when their torch party will arrive. Of course, I can't find anything. Why would I? If Michael doesn't know (or claims he doesn't) then why would it be posted on the internet?
Isn't it awful that I am actively wishing this unit would arrive? This means that I am wishing this God awful deployment on another family. I'm sorry, I am just sick of our deployment, and would give anything to know an end date. Or at least a week long window of some sort.
I can't wait to have my husband home.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Summertime and the Livin's Easy...
Not much going on here lately. Working on my tan, and working at the restaurant. Missing Michael every minute and counting the days until he can come home again, for good this time.
Hope everyone else is having a great summer!
Hope everyone else is having a great summer!
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
I Love E-Mail
I especially love e-mail when it is from the Brigadier General of my husband's brigade. He stated that although he couldn't give specific dates (OPSEC again), he was able to tell us that we could meet the soldiers upon their return at the demobilization station. There they would go through meetings, health screenings, etc., and then come home to Delaware, and their welcome home ceremony.
He also gave dates for their 30, 60 and 90 day reintegration meetings. I complain about these meetings, because the pre-mob meeting was dreadful, but you know what, I get to spend a whole day with my husband, what more could I ask for? The 90 day meeting is an overnight one, and the Army provides accommodations - a mini vacay?
I also received a second e-mail from our Brigade assistant, who stated our last day to send packages to our soldiers was July 31, and letters, August 15.
I am so excited. This deployment actually will END!
He also gave dates for their 30, 60 and 90 day reintegration meetings. I complain about these meetings, because the pre-mob meeting was dreadful, but you know what, I get to spend a whole day with my husband, what more could I ask for? The 90 day meeting is an overnight one, and the Army provides accommodations - a mini vacay?
I also received a second e-mail from our Brigade assistant, who stated our last day to send packages to our soldiers was July 31, and letters, August 15.
I am so excited. This deployment actually will END!
Monday, July 20, 2009
My Husband
Dear Husband,
I don't know if you read this, or if you know how much I love you, but I think you should know. (In case you didn't already) When you first walked through those doors at Thrashers, after so generously offering me a ride home from work, I couldn't help but notice how cute you were with your backwards hat and sunglasses. I first noticed your smile, and then your shoulders and arms (still my favorite!), later I would notice how kind and generous you were.
Only a short month after we met, you went away to OBC for two weeks, and I only heard from you once on the phone. Before you left, you bought me DVD's to keep my occupied, and I quickly realized after only about 4 days of being apart, of how much I missed you and wanted you around. I was so happy to get an envelope in the mail, and was even more surprised to see that you had written a letter to me everyday that you had been away. I think you had my heart right then and there.
Six years later, I don't think I could ever love you more, but that could change tomorrow. These ten months of being apart have been so hard. How do you go about your day without your best friend? I went from telling you everything at the end of the day, to hoping I would remember everything and was able to fit everything in to our ten minute conversations in the morning. I am so thankful for those phone calls. Just hearing your voice, and knowing that you were still ok meant the world to me.
Not every day has been easy. There have been days when I didn't think I would be able to make it without you (but what other choice is there?), and a glass of wine at the end of the day has turned into three (note to all other spouses of deployed soldiers: drinking is not a good idea), but I have survived. We have survived.
I am so proud of you. There is no way I could do what you do. When I think it's hard for me, I think about what you are giving up...not just me, but your family, friends and the slots :) Your strength through all of this has made me love you even more, if that's possible. I love you. You are an amazing man and I am so proud to call you my husband.
Always,
Your Wife
I don't know if you read this, or if you know how much I love you, but I think you should know. (In case you didn't already) When you first walked through those doors at Thrashers, after so generously offering me a ride home from work, I couldn't help but notice how cute you were with your backwards hat and sunglasses. I first noticed your smile, and then your shoulders and arms (still my favorite!), later I would notice how kind and generous you were.
Only a short month after we met, you went away to OBC for two weeks, and I only heard from you once on the phone. Before you left, you bought me DVD's to keep my occupied, and I quickly realized after only about 4 days of being apart, of how much I missed you and wanted you around. I was so happy to get an envelope in the mail, and was even more surprised to see that you had written a letter to me everyday that you had been away. I think you had my heart right then and there.
Six years later, I don't think I could ever love you more, but that could change tomorrow. These ten months of being apart have been so hard. How do you go about your day without your best friend? I went from telling you everything at the end of the day, to hoping I would remember everything and was able to fit everything in to our ten minute conversations in the morning. I am so thankful for those phone calls. Just hearing your voice, and knowing that you were still ok meant the world to me.
Not every day has been easy. There have been days when I didn't think I would be able to make it without you (but what other choice is there?), and a glass of wine at the end of the day has turned into three (note to all other spouses of deployed soldiers: drinking is not a good idea), but I have survived. We have survived.
I am so proud of you. There is no way I could do what you do. When I think it's hard for me, I think about what you are giving up...not just me, but your family, friends and the slots :) Your strength through all of this has made me love you even more, if that's possible. I love you. You are an amazing man and I am so proud to call you my husband.
Always,
Your Wife
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Running Confession
I have been a lazy bum. There is no other way to describe it. I started off really good in April, for about a month, and then, I'm not sure what happened. Between the end of school, and Michael coming home, I just made every excuse not to run. Michael was home, and I didn't run at all!
Finally, with the realization that I was actually going to have to run this 10 miler, I got up early on Monday morning, laced up my shoes, and started again. I ran 3.18 miles the first day (and surprisingly didn't die), Tuesday, 3.5 miles. I took a day off on Wednesday so my muscles didn't hate me, and then 4 miles Thursday, and yesterday (on probably the hottest/most humid day of the summer) I want 4.25 miles. I still had to stop a few times, but I did much better than I anticipated with not running. I need to make sure I still give myself a day to rest, so I have decided to run two days, and rest one, and every once in awhile cross train in the pool.
So here's the plan, the Army Ten Miler is quickly approaching (Oct. 4!!) I have decided that if I can run 6 miles by the time school starts in a month, and then 8 by the time Michael comes home, I will be fine. Even if I don't get all the way up to 10 miles. I am pretty sure that I will be able to push myself the last mile to the end.
What do you think? Coach Dubis? Any ideas?
Finally, with the realization that I was actually going to have to run this 10 miler, I got up early on Monday morning, laced up my shoes, and started again. I ran 3.18 miles the first day (and surprisingly didn't die), Tuesday, 3.5 miles. I took a day off on Wednesday so my muscles didn't hate me, and then 4 miles Thursday, and yesterday (on probably the hottest/most humid day of the summer) I want 4.25 miles. I still had to stop a few times, but I did much better than I anticipated with not running. I need to make sure I still give myself a day to rest, so I have decided to run two days, and rest one, and every once in awhile cross train in the pool.
So here's the plan, the Army Ten Miler is quickly approaching (Oct. 4!!) I have decided that if I can run 6 miles by the time school starts in a month, and then 8 by the time Michael comes home, I will be fine. Even if I don't get all the way up to 10 miles. I am pretty sure that I will be able to push myself the last mile to the end.
What do you think? Coach Dubis? Any ideas?
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Will I Every get out of School?
The answer to that is 'no.' Technically because I will be teaching in one for the next 26 years, but also because I just can't seem to get away from taking classes to get a pay raise, umm, I mean further my education.
Anyway, I graduated with my Master's last winter and swore I would take a break. That lasted all of one month when I decided I would get my +15 credits. I have decided to do it in Educational Technology as it is 5 classes and would give me the 15 credits easily. About a month ago, Michael forwarded me an e-mail that detailed a program that would give me money to go to school while Michael was deployed. This money is only good up to 180 days after he comes home, which means I need to have these five classes done by Spring Block 1.
Here's where it gets tricky, there is a pre-req that I tried to take last year, but isn't being offered until this Fall. I emailed that professor in charge of the program asking if it would be possible if I took another class while take this pre-req (I explained the money situation and why I needed to finish so quickly). She then proceeded to tell me because of the 'rigor' of the program, they only allow students to take one class per block. I have never heard of such a thing, but trust me I can do it.
She proceeded to go on and on for about 10 minutes about how rigorous the program was, and I needed to understand this, and I couldn't argue with my grade, what I got was what I got. It was so ridiculous I put her on speak so my Mom could hear. I then proceeded to explain to her that I always took 18 credits (the max), worked THREE jobs and students taught and still graduated summa cum laude. She obviousy doesn't know anything about me and my OCD tendencies.
Anyway, long story short, she is letting me double up each block and finish by Spring. She is also my professor for two of the classes. She made it clear that she is very strict and follows the rubric to a T, so if I got a 'C' I couldn't complain.
Bring it.
Anyway, I graduated with my Master's last winter and swore I would take a break. That lasted all of one month when I decided I would get my +15 credits. I have decided to do it in Educational Technology as it is 5 classes and would give me the 15 credits easily. About a month ago, Michael forwarded me an e-mail that detailed a program that would give me money to go to school while Michael was deployed. This money is only good up to 180 days after he comes home, which means I need to have these five classes done by Spring Block 1.
Here's where it gets tricky, there is a pre-req that I tried to take last year, but isn't being offered until this Fall. I emailed that professor in charge of the program asking if it would be possible if I took another class while take this pre-req (I explained the money situation and why I needed to finish so quickly). She then proceeded to tell me because of the 'rigor' of the program, they only allow students to take one class per block. I have never heard of such a thing, but trust me I can do it.
She proceeded to go on and on for about 10 minutes about how rigorous the program was, and I needed to understand this, and I couldn't argue with my grade, what I got was what I got. It was so ridiculous I put her on speak so my Mom could hear. I then proceeded to explain to her that I always took 18 credits (the max), worked THREE jobs and students taught and still graduated summa cum laude. She obviousy doesn't know anything about me and my OCD tendencies.
Anyway, long story short, she is letting me double up each block and finish by Spring. She is also my professor for two of the classes. She made it clear that she is very strict and follows the rubric to a T, so if I got a 'C' I couldn't complain.
Bring it.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
And Another Thing....
There are many things that I have become tired with over this deployment, and many things that I have realized. Being a military family is one of the hardest things to be. To constantly worry, not know and miss someone is exhausting. No one can fully understand what it is like unless you have lived it.
What I have also realized is how forgotten our military members can become. Every day, a soldier dies overseas or at home and yet where are they in the news. Recently a high profile singer passed away. Yes, he was a great entertainer and singer, however he was also just that. He didn't do anything to better society or give his life so that others could have a better one. I am so sick of hearing about him.
He passed away on June 25, but so did 1st Lt Brian Bradshaw. Did anyone hear about him in the news? No, instead, this entertainer was covered by the media 24/7 and a TRUE American hero was never heard about. What a disgrace. What kind of country do we live in? A city spent 4 million to remember an entertainer, and yet how much was spent on the funeral of this 1st Lt, and American HERO? Below is a message from his Aunt that puts it into perspective. God bless 1Lt Bradshaw and his family. Thank you for your service and I am so sorry for your loss.
A TRUE American Hero
What I have also realized is how forgotten our military members can become. Every day, a soldier dies overseas or at home and yet where are they in the news. Recently a high profile singer passed away. Yes, he was a great entertainer and singer, however he was also just that. He didn't do anything to better society or give his life so that others could have a better one. I am so sick of hearing about him.
He passed away on June 25, but so did 1st Lt Brian Bradshaw. Did anyone hear about him in the news? No, instead, this entertainer was covered by the media 24/7 and a TRUE American hero was never heard about. What a disgrace. What kind of country do we live in? A city spent 4 million to remember an entertainer, and yet how much was spent on the funeral of this 1st Lt, and American HERO? Below is a message from his Aunt that puts it into perspective. God bless 1Lt Bradshaw and his family. Thank you for your service and I am so sorry for your loss.
A TRUE American Hero
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Tired
Of everything. I guess I am in a rut after Michael left to go back to that hated country. I am just so tired of it all. I want him home with me, to help with the dogs and household chores that I am just tired of doing. I want him in bed next to me at night. We bought an amazing king size bed while he was home over leave, and it was delivered on Friday. It feels so huge without him in it. Of course the animals have enjoyed it, but it isn't the same.
I am tired of work, but keep volunteering to pick up more shifts so I am not sitting at home by myself. At least I am making money for the house we hope to build when he comes home. (I'm not getting my hopes up though, I always do and then it never happens). I really don't even mind the work, I think it's the fact that there is nothing waiting for me when I get home (To be far, the dogs wait for me everyday and love to see me, but it's not the same)
I don't even feel like blogging about anything right now. It's just the same things day in and day out. Get up early, take care of the dogs, back to bed, work maybe, or sit at home and wait for work.
I am just tired of this deployment and ready for October and to see my husband everyday.
I am tired of work, but keep volunteering to pick up more shifts so I am not sitting at home by myself. At least I am making money for the house we hope to build when he comes home. (I'm not getting my hopes up though, I always do and then it never happens). I really don't even mind the work, I think it's the fact that there is nothing waiting for me when I get home (To be far, the dogs wait for me everyday and love to see me, but it's not the same)
I don't even feel like blogging about anything right now. It's just the same things day in and day out. Get up early, take care of the dogs, back to bed, work maybe, or sit at home and wait for work.
I am just tired of this deployment and ready for October and to see my husband everyday.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Back to Work I go...
Not teaching yet! Another month or so for that, thank goodness! Yesterday was my first day back at the restaurant after an amazing 15 days off. We were SLAMMED. There were only three of us on, the entire dining room was full and we had a wait. Normally when this happens we have five waitresses on. Talk about exhaustion by the end of the night. When I counted my tips though, it was worth all the running around! Today was slower, but I still made decent money. I have off tomorrow to recover before a very long weekend.
Michael still isn't in Iraq. He is in Kuwait patiently waiting for a flight back to what I like to call, the shittiest country in the world. Anway, I feel so bad for him because he doesn't have a set place to sleep, or access to the internet. At least in SCITW he has internet a nice bed and a phone to call me! As long as he arrives there safely I will be happy!
Michael still isn't in Iraq. He is in Kuwait patiently waiting for a flight back to what I like to call, the shittiest country in the world. Anway, I feel so bad for him because he doesn't have a set place to sleep, or access to the internet. At least in SCITW he has internet a nice bed and a phone to call me! As long as he arrives there safely I will be happy!
Monday, July 6, 2009
Alone....Again
I thought that saying goodbye to Michael 9 months ago and watching that bus drive away was one of the hardest things I had ever done. I have changed my mind. This morning, as they called Michael's zone for boarding, I felt my heart drop. In fact, it may still be on the floor in Philly.
Right now he is flying somewhere over the Atlantic, getting further and further away with every minute that passes. The past 15 days were the most amazing I have ever had. Just being with my husband is a wonderful thing, and I am so grateful for him.
I know that we are on the downward slope of our deployment, and there isn't much left, but it doesn't make our time apart any easier. So many people have said, "Don't worry, it will be here before you know it." Maybe for them yes because they aren't in the situation. Their significant other isn't in a freaking war zone or away for months at a time. And I am sure when I look back on this time in October, it will have gone by fast. But right now, my heart hurts and I miss my husband.
On his layover in Atlanta today, I received this text message before his plane took off:
I'm going to go ahead and turn off my phone. I miss you more than you know and love you more than the moon and the stars.
Only 86 more days according to the Donut of Misery. It can't get here fast enough.
The first night is always the hardest....
Right now he is flying somewhere over the Atlantic, getting further and further away with every minute that passes. The past 15 days were the most amazing I have ever had. Just being with my husband is a wonderful thing, and I am so grateful for him.
I know that we are on the downward slope of our deployment, and there isn't much left, but it doesn't make our time apart any easier. So many people have said, "Don't worry, it will be here before you know it." Maybe for them yes because they aren't in the situation. Their significant other isn't in a freaking war zone or away for months at a time. And I am sure when I look back on this time in October, it will have gone by fast. But right now, my heart hurts and I miss my husband.
On his layover in Atlanta today, I received this text message before his plane took off:
I'm going to go ahead and turn off my phone. I miss you more than you know and love you more than the moon and the stars.
Only 86 more days according to the Donut of Misery. It can't get here fast enough.
The first night is always the hardest....
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Last Day
This totally blows. Today is my last full day with my husband while he is home on R & R. Can I tell you how much I hate that damn country? I don't think I could even put it into words.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Happy 4th of July!
This Fourth of July will be spent at a Phillies game with my husband. What a better way to spend the day...an American pastime with an American hero (and mine of course!)
I hope everyone enjoys the sun, parades and BBQ's!
I hope everyone enjoys the sun, parades and BBQ's!
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Welcome July!
It is so nice to write this with my husband actually HOME! This month marks the beginning of month 9 of this deployment. Think about it, if I had gotten pregnant before he left, I would already have a baby by now. Insane.
Anyway, July is starting off great. My husband is home for another 5 days (still not long enough), we saw the Hangover today (insanely funny) and the weather has been gorgeous out which has allowed me to work on my tan.
Life is good.
Anyway, July is starting off great. My husband is home for another 5 days (still not long enough), we saw the Hangover today (insanely funny) and the weather has been gorgeous out which has allowed me to work on my tan.
Life is good.
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