Hopes

Hope is a funny thing. It is fleeting, but when you have it, it feels like everything might actually work out. When Michael is deployed, he actually has a pretty good mission. I will not say exactly what he will be doing or where because of safety, but if he has to be in the Middle East, this job would be the closest thing I would consider to being safe. I was comforted by this fact. I also worried about the communication overseas. You hear stories about families not hearing from loved ones for weeks at a time. Since Michael is assigned to this job, he will be able to access at least one form of communication on any given day. This doesn't mean he will call everyday, but it is nice to know it's possible.

Hope. It can make a bad situation seem bearable. But then sometimes, hope seems to change. Now the job that he has is still what I would call 'safe.' (I don't know if this is possible in a war zone, but I like to think so) And then my loving husband informs me that mortar rounds go off everyday and no matter how many men in uniform are on base, there is always danger. Maybe I didn't need to know everything. At some point last week, Michael also informed me there would be a phone in his office. Again, hope reared it's ugly head. Even though my husband likes to protect me, he doesn't want to get my hopes up. I was informed that communication is sporadic and just because he has a phone doesn't mean he can use it. I was also told at some point that if he doesn't hear from me for awhile it could be because something has happened to one of the units on base and they have a blackout. This prevents bad news from getting to families before they are informed. Wow. Comforting. I know it is important to know these things so I don't get my hopes up and expect a phone call everyday, but can't a girl catch a break? If I can't touch him or see him I at least want to hear his voice. Hope. I am sure it's not the last time this feeling somehow can so quickly vanish.